Be Awesome, true story

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A Statement

♥ I was growing up, and now i am growing old. Follow me, not in the chase of youth, but in the journey of understanding myself better.

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< @xueqi04

A List

No 1 Buy a pair of awesome heels

No 2 Finish my school Assignment

No 3 Wait for payday! Wheee

No 4 Donna's Birthday

I Love

Yoga Lin. Pipa. Music. Lang Lang. Tyra Banks. America's Next Top Model. How i met your mother. Scandal. The client list. 康熙来了.

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WAY BELOW EXPECTATION

I hate my luyao. It is way below my own expectation, let alone when it comes to sam. I hear the yinse, and how come it became like this?! Its not fair.. ITS REALLY NOT FAIR! I worked hard to get a more audible luyao.. But now? What happened to it! Why is everything so sucky!

Why isit that i cannot play a luyao that i am at least satisfied with? I dont know, and i am very frustrated! This is not up to my own expectation. The lun is rubbish, fast parts are a total gone today. Why did i deprove drastically? I hate myself. That is why i hate deproving, because the hard work that i did to achieve what i once had were now gone and i have to find it back again.. And it's no guarantee that i can get it back. Why did this happen to me on the week of my solo!

I find it so disgusting. It irks me. Really does. I find no one that understands me. When my mood is down, i really hope that person will know and stop asking me. I have to go through this myself. Hai, i have no choice too. I didnt want this to happen. I took whatever time i could to practise, but it doesnt sound nice. Its not the qin that is not nice.. It is me that is not nice. What should i do.. What should i do?

It backfired me, my own fingers.. Sometimes i hoped that i can wash my hands straight away after practising.. Maybe in that way i will play better the next round.. I have become extreme. What should i do..

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