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Interesting people i see in hsing hai and they are very cute. Whenever i feel so down i will feel happy when i reached hsing hai.. Almost everyone is very nice inside.. Yesterday i saw xinyan in the mrt, so funny.. but we didnt talk much, because she is going to alight in the next stop! Its ok, thurday i get to see xinyan and shu ning! clara i see her often la.. haha.. I am dead.. every week got someone birthday.. next week is ivan, the week after is shu ning! oh my.. spend and spend and spend money! ahh! These few days i have been troubled by this same question-friend. I dont know whether responsibility is what a friend should have, but to me, responsibility to friends are very important to me. And sometimes, i just can't help feeling that some friends havent been doing that. I dont know whether i was right in enlisting everyone into my good friends circle, maybe i should be that naive in the first place. What i am saying now isn't referring to anyone, just that i realised similar things have happened and i pretended i can go by very happily, but apparantly it isnt so. Maybe i should learn to be like michelle, having that barrier formed between myself and everyone, maybe like that, i wont feel so affected sometimes by friends. When we are friends, i am responsible for your happiness and sadness whenever you have, and i have the responsibility to care and concern. This are why friends are around, they serve as a wall for you to rely on, or rather, shoulders. But sometimes, the wall will crack too, the shoulders feel tired too, so we cannot always rely on friends, but when you are feeling so tired and angry with yourself, friends are there for you to rely on, that is when we realised the importance of friends. But not over-reliance. I am not saying about anyone i stress. These are what i have realised this past 1 week, and not one day, so dont be sensitive ok. I realised, i havent much friends there for me, to really rely on. But without it, i believe i can go on well too. A lot of people are too self centered, so i guess i cant really find someone who can really understand and finish listening to what i want to say. Or rather, who that really understands me. People who understands me, are too far away from me. I cant do much.. hai, its too complicating. I really dont want to think. I am going to continue with my life, to work hard and to treasure my third year with my buddies in school. To appreciate all that i have, and to understand that all dont come easy for me.. I will and can do it.  |