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Sometimes, i feel very wierd. Sometimes when things arent my concern it has to come to me. Not that it cannot come to me, but coming to me today is not right, because my mood havent been good since evening. I didnt have time and space to myself the whole night, maybe going online wasnt a good decision for me today. I have the problems practising, you can say its my 瓶颈, because i have no idea what to do to make it better. And i have to be constantly reminded how lousy i am. How funny right. Demoralising but not depressing, it just got me to think i should just work harder so that some people wouldnt have so little confidence in me. Maybe all along i havent been any better. But what can i do than to continue working hard? I have been working hard for 3 years. I will be able to do it by december :) feel so happy that ivan knows that he made the wrong decision. It can be a right decision, if u didnt plan to continue competition. But it will be wrong, if u had plans to go competitive. And u dont look like amateur to me. Hope you work hard. Maybe i cant take so many problems over me. School project, lecturer, quintet performance, pipa, friends. Too many things i have to handle. I even doubt, can i celebrate my birthday happily? |